Inspired by Gram

R. eally A.lready
I.M. Not Jimbo

Sometimes I look at my hands, fingers jutting from knuckle like branches from a corkscrew willow. As they bend like a rusty hinge that never saw the glory of 3 in 1.

I can’t help but think of Gram. Her hands and fingers so twisted and swollen that just the sight of them conjured a brilliant phantom of pain in my own green hands. Yet after nearly ninety decades she would still get down on her knees and yank those persistent weeds from the garden, an enemy that she could see a fight that she still could fight.

Her sore exhausted hips sounding off as firecrackers as she struggled to the ground. by then she was ripping out prized irises and other beautiful plants convinced they were weeds but nonetheless she still fought through the pain to do what she was driven to. I’ve been facing this, on and off for nearly thirty years. Only as this level has been reached can I begin to grasp the amount of pain that poor amazing woman must have felt. A feeling akin to someone drilling directly into my knees with the dullest of drill bits. Waking to realize that some bitter hobgoblin had individually pressed each digit to anvil and struck down with hammer as I fitfully slept. The click finally came, that aha moment.

My inspiration to fight is strengthened by several but none more so than that 5 feet of fight that could conquer nearly anything.

Thanks Mom Stuff I love Number 1

I wrote this to express my gratitude on Mother’s day. This is not typical of what you can expect to find here on I just wanted to say thank you to my Mom and my Great Grandmother for all that they have done for me. I plan to eventually have a column called stuff that I love. Let’s call this the inaugural post.


Once again it’s Mothers day and I have nothing to give that can even begin to match all that she has done for me. I was fortunate enough to have essentially two mothers, my mom and my Great grandmother.

Gram was a wonderful woman that has since gone home to be with the lord. She was so many things to me as well as so many others. The woman had a hand in raising generation after generation. To give an idea she was 72 when I was born and I was fortunate to have her in my life until I was 21 years old.  I sometimes think she somehow fought it out until I became an adult. She was both the toughest and one of the most caring people I have ever known all wrapped up in one mighty little package.

Me and Gram


me and gram

can you believe she used to let me do her hair

I don’t want to get negative in this little essay here, so I’ll just be generous and say my dad was a not a helpful presence. It was great for my mom and I that we had Gram. Now I’m not saying my mom couldn’t have done it without gram there, having her there just made things so much better.

On to the actual focus of this piece, my mom. Gram also had a significant hand in raising her. It shows, through her strength, intelligence and beauty.  I’m not sure my mom always realizes just how strong she is, or how proud I am of her for that.

me and mom

Me and my wonderful mom

I am also proud of how successful my mom was on a professional level. To this day I still meet people that worked with her even just briefly years ago, and they have nothing but praise.

Everyone likes my mom. Other than a few people that obviously have some serious issues of their own. You can’t win em all. It is kind of funny; I have never met anyone else that people take a liking to so quickly. I know it may just seem like my bias, but it is much more than that.

As an example:  I have friends that have only met her once years ago and still to this day talk about how great she is. Or an even better example of this: we worked as a real estate team about ten years ago. Not long ago I ran into an agent that we worked a deal with. She still talks about how great it was working with my mother. This agent is not some weekend warrior or bored housewife; she is a big time multi- million dollar producer. It was really cool to me that my mom had that much of a lasting effect on her, that after all those years and countless deals. She still remembered her quite fondly.

Perhaps the thing I am most proud of is her strength. I won’t be getting personal here; I’ll just say there were definitely some rough times.  A number of them caused by me. She had the strength and perseverance to see us through. Had I been born to a lesser woman I’m pretty sure I would just be some faded memory somewhere along the way.

Her creativity is also worth mentioning. It comes from my great grandmother, that women could do just about anything, calling her a crafter would be like calling one of the masters just painters. Now I’m not sure if these types of skills are inherited or taught, I suspect it is some sort of combination. There were only two people I have known that came close to matching her. My mom and her mother my grandma Wawa.  Gram and grandma Wawa are no longer with us, but their creativity lives on through my mom and she definitely does them justice.


I am thankful everyday that I have my mom. I’m going on 34 and I know that I can still call on my mom for anything. I know that I am not as strong or as kind or as creative (well I might have that one) as my mom, but I know that I have the potential to be because of what she has taught me. This has given me the desire to always strive to be a better me.

I hope that throughout my life that I can do her and gram justice. If in the end I am fortunate enough to have had even a fraction of the positive impact they have had on people, I’m cool with that.

So, Thanks Mom I love you and Happy Mothers Day


To anyone reading this who doesn’t know me, I do look a bit different nowadays.


RED= edit. Note on my father:   I don’t usually change things once I’ve written them but there is no sense in hurting people that do not deserve it. Those who were around know what was up, it doesn’t mean I didn’t love the dude. This post is about my mom and all the wonderful that she did in spite of things.